throwbacksss...

i was browsing through my old xanga today and i came across some funny gems. i guess i used to post AIM conversations quite a bit.

Things I noticed...

tbh, i was a completely worthless son and disrespected my parents wayyy too much. i see how terrible i made it for them during hs. if i could time travel to talk to myself back in the day. i would tell myself to shut up and grow up. :sigh:

i played too much poker paintball and video games.

i was a very proud and ignorant christian (still learning).

i also realize how much i loved to talk about girls and ladies. hahahaha, nothing has changed there.

i was pretty immature and thought i wasn't. honestly, i was just a whole bunch of fail. on the real.

oh well, i'm learning.

please enjoy these...

best jersey: the one above (kobe ftw)

best post: this is probably the best post i did, most likely.

best lesson: #2 hs lesson
dont make a person your priority when you're just an option

Monday, April 05, 2004

HaNdiCaPpEdxBoi: haha did russ show you the pic of his date? faithfulxservant: yea faithfulxservant: i've seen her already HaNdiCaPpEdxBoi: do you think she is cute? faithfulxservant: she's aiite HaNdiCaPpEdxBoi: russ made her sound like she was kristen kreuk hot HaNdiCaPpEdxBoi: so i got pretty happy for him...and i saw the pic HaNdiCaPpEdxBoi: and i was pretty dam disappointed HaNdiCaPpEdxBoi: i was like...o wth....she isnt that hot russ.....he ruined it for me faithfulxservant: AHAHHAHAHHAH @mexicali RuSS/MaTT...tu madre: well...this was seriously awsome...just watching these two bros go back and forth about each others mother...but i think we all know that russ won the battle...but lost the war, cuz he got thrown into the spit pit, which is a pit filled with our toothpaste crud and other random sick stuf...it's nasty.... So we laughed our heads off...especailly at the park, me and jc were having a lot of fun spectating matt and russ. it was pretty sweet...haha...here's a little sample of what was russ' last words b4 going into the spit pit... Matt: " i think i'll be the bigger man and just stop talking. " Russ: " i think i AM the BIGGER man. " woo! aiite..nuff of that... @basketball sophmoreyear july 16, 2004 ok so adrian was watchin his lil niece run around after our b-ball game and he's like...COME HERE! and then she looks at the street...then looks at him...and starts to run for the street...he grabs her....and starts to say this: " ok...ur gonna run into the street and get hit, and then ima have to Kill somebody..cuz if you get hurt, there's gonna be some reprecussions..." LOL o man, i love my black friends.. @mt. hermon jr. year july 10, 2004 Dear God, Hey! How are yah? It’s been quite a week, hasn’t it? Once again, it was a blessing to come back to your loving and caring arms. I feel so guilty and regret that I neglected all those chances to talk to you during this past year. My fault, just like it is always. Still, I find myself at a loss of words as I have grown to love and know you deeper. The coolest thing that I learned this week was about your love. How… it is a compelling love and the story of how you changed the life of Zacchaeus. How… it is a merciful love and how a sinner such as the woman came to be saved by you. How… it is acompassionate love and how in Hebrews it talks about how you can sympathize with us for you were once human as well. How… it is a sacrificial love and how you endured torture and died on the cross. How… it is an unfailing love, and one in which we are always connected to you. Well, even though you already know, the week was awesome to say the least. I hope you don’t mind if I run down the things that occurred, as well as my thoughts, feelings and 2 cents. So it all began the night before, while I was washing my car that I looked up at the night sky, which was filled with many stars. I realized kind of how small our planet was…in a “gi-normous” galaxy! This just kind of sat on my heart the whole way up to Mt. Hermon. So the next day was Sunday and we were there early, ready to leave. The only thing that kind of put me on edge was the fact that the bus driver didn’t know the way to the churches, and he didn’t say anything to me till we REALLY needed directions. I just felt you put some pressure on me, which I can see did me some good. So yeah, praise YOU for getting us to the churches and eventually up the road. I thank you for my two awesome parents who gave me maps to help out the driver. It’s just all in your plan… Then at camp, you kind of took me by surprise after I checked in and found out my cabin was a group of first timers minus me and Aaron (who was in my cabin last year) that’s just all the more sweet. Anyways, Lord, the part that really took me from right under me, was the “sister cabin”. … I was hyped-out/speechless/crazy/calm about it all… It was a good cabin, but the unreal fact that I had the ONLY junior/sophomore cabin with the one girl that I never thought would be in it… (We’ll leave that name out to protect the innocent) Through the rest of the week, I began to realize that you do work in mysterious ways, in ways that I don’t really understand or comprehend at first glance but after meticulous study….I see your plan and Providence. I still don’t understand it all, but I do grasp the situation better while thinking about it. So about me and this friend, we had a little relational drama…and somewhere along our lives’ path, got disconnected. A lot of things, such as confusion and hurt could’ve been prevented if we only kept talking. Still, gossip kind of killed it and drove a dagger in deeper. So during this week, you just kept healing it up. A lot of damage was done, but through you, I believe it can now start to heal. There could be a scar, but just remembrance of what once happened. Still continuing with the week, you were just … so present everywhere. There was no where,--no where~ that I couldn’t feel your love surrounding me. It was pretty awesome possum! =) I had an awesome time with my cabin. Thank you Lord, for just placing in my heart, a better attitude towards you, life, school, my cabin, and cabin leader. Last year I had a bad attitude and that just lead towards a bad week. You gave me exactly what I needed… I still don’t believe how perfect it came out. Our whole cabin just molded like clay and our finished product was a beautiful jar, just waiting to be broken again by your hand. I felt that we shared and got so much out of our cabin times. I praise You for the seriousness and just how much our cabin had love for you and your word. ALL PRAISE TO YOUR NAME FATHER. My personal favorite this week was the prayer meetings. By your unfailing grace and mercy, I was somehow sustained and was given enough energy to get up and go to them early in the morning. It was there, every morning that my heart was prepared to worship your name. Lord, I was thinking about just your providence and plan for all of us. I praise you that you used Jared, Koh, Kiyoshi, Daniel, Kenny, Courtney, Steph, and even me… just to praise your name. Praise you, Father, for T…he was so awesome. I really got to understand him better just through the prayer groups. My cabin was something to be said for, Lord. You put people into my life, just how I needed it. Compassionate and loving are words to be said…at least. They’re a bunch of guys that love your name, and want to praise it. Lord, I just learned so much from them and their way of life. Thank you for providing me with just such an abundant amount of love for them. They always had something insightful to say or something funny to do. Whether from Jake’s crazy haircut, or just Uber Sexy Paul… It was awesome. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for my cabin leader, Chris Wu. Heh, though it is hard to see through the fog, in the distance we see your light, guiding us home. We don’t know where it’ll take us, but we know that if we follow the light, it’ll all turn out fine in the end. Your unknown plan, your endless wisdom…all of it is constantly in motion. Your servant, Chris, has just done so much to help heal my wounds. Lord, I thank you for sending him to help me, and just when I needed counsel and help the most. Lord, your plan has never failed, and it will never fail. I find myself at a loss of words as I see how you used him to talk and give me advice. It was YOU who set him before me, when I felt lost, alone…and afraid. Lord thank you for him. Lord, my life alone is nothing and my debt that I owe is an insurmountable amount, that I could….never … never attain. Lord, I recall my past mistakes, and I ask you that you forgive me. I am a sinner, and I’m not perfect, yet you are. It feels so good to talk with you Lord. I feel comforted, and not afraid. I’m able to come to the cross and lay my shame, burden and loss at the foot of it. Lord, I thank you for Stephen, Lord; I know that you have big plans for him as you just have shown me just how great a person he is. I write this prayer to you Lord, in tears for the blessing he’s been to me. I am choked up inside as he has just been what a best friend is. He’s been there for me when I needed someone to talk to. Lord, he prayed for me when no one would. He never talks on me, he’s always supportive and I can always count on him for a good laugh. Lord, thank you for awesome brothers like him. Lord, I feel I am sometimes jealous of just who he is. Thought he is younger, he is mature. Maybe not in some ways, but I feel he is strong in you. Please keep him safe, and bless his life. I cry out to you, for your patience, mercy, and grace. I pray that I might keep myself pure until marriage. That I wouldn’t be persuaded by temptation, but that I would stand firm in that which I believe. I pray that you would give me patience for I know I will need it when it comes to girls. Lord, I give this to you, as it is one of my weaknesses. I need to hold back, and Lord, I pray for strength to hold back. Lord, not of my own strength, but your own…for I realize and know…and can testify to, we have no strength other than what is you. Lord, I pray that I might be a brother, and not a lover to anyone, that I would not fall into temptation, but that I would be an example. Lord, I pray that I do not lose sight of you. Keep me accountable, Lord. I pray that if there is someone for me, that you would keep her away until that time, because I know for a fact I am not ready. I am so immature and so helpless…Lord that I need more of you. I pray that as I do grow up, that I would grow up spiritually, and not be an infant. That I would be growing constantly, and be concerned with you’re good and perfect will. I pray that I develop a hunger and thirst that is never satisfied. Lord I pray that I wouldn’t concern myself with who I’ll have as my wife, or if I I’ll even have one. Lord, but I pray that you would have me focus on myself and that I would shape, by your careful hand, into a Man of God. Lord just like my leaders, the ones I look up to… J, Drew, T, Taka, and Craig…Lord and everyone else…They’re such inspirations to me. Lord, it was you who planned this whole week, just how it all came out, I still can’t believe it, how you worked in people’s lives. The fact that we had so many come to know you as their personal Lord and Savior, that they know they will be in the Lamb’s book of life; that you’re their “everything” and their reason for Life…Praise Your Name. Lord, as I come to know you, I see that you work so mysteriously, and without even notice. Do people even thank you when you’ve healed/changed their life? I sure hope they do. Lord, Thank you for this week, my life, and your Love. In Your name I pray, Amen @wanting my RSX Sunday, December 19, 2004 Four Cars... i need a choice soon... HELP ME PLEASE!!! i want a mix of speed, sporty, and some cargo room...the wrx can't be a wagon, there is no mini under the "other" category. Any other help is welcomed. 1. acura rsx type-s 2. subie wrx 3. mazda 3 4. scion tC i can't believe i got it 6 years laterrrr. @girltalk... my girls section: i got one of the most memorable quotes said to me, and i swear i'll never forget the way it hit me. i wont tell who said it, but most people dont know her anyways. but yeah...we were talking about all these different girls that are cute, or good looking or who have a great personality, but they still lack one key element, whether it be personality, humor, religion...etc. And them i was talking about this one girl (decently cute, but buddhist) and how cool it would be to just go hang out and actually try to get to know her and it'd be downhill from there, and (wise girl) says this " Don't settle for less." (cause she knows about my strict religious choosing) and i thought about it...and she's so right. why should anyone, especially the person i love the most (me) settle for anything less than the best. i mean, God wants the best for me, so do I !!! so i applied it to different situations and realized, yeah, i'm never gonna settle for what's there, second best, or whatever else. It's like, why settle for a kia when you can get a porsche. Dont settle for the temporary pleasure, when you get an eternal treasure @finally meeting michelle baik. this is mainly for tina, enjoy making fun of me. hahaha. Tuesday, March 15, 2005 this is how it went, i was sitting down with amanda and kev talking about some nonsense i think, and then i'm watchin as kids pull up and get dropped off, and i'm just searching through the faces and i see this one girl in a UCLA (? ucsd or uci ... not sure ) anyways, a college embroided sweatshirt, and i was like OMG she looks so familliar and then i was like. :gasp: . NO WAY! it's michelle baiK! the girl who i've been trying to meet in person for like the past three years of my life, going to OA choir shows, and everything. and somehow, i finally see her! so what do i do...absolutely nothing. =\ yah, that's typical jtizzle for you.. haha, so i was like, :sigh: i'll just wait for God to make it completely obivious that i should go up and talk to her. so i like i miss this chance, and i'm like regretting it during the testing period...the whole time. but wait. during our breaks Olivia comes out and talks to me and she's like, Did you know michelle is here. and i'm thinking in my head: " yes, i knew that from the beginning " and then she's like, go talk to her! and i'm like " what have i been doing with the last 3 years of my life ? " anyways, i'm like, yah i'll go and talk to her after ( if God somehow makes her walk right in front of me, that was like the only way i'd go for it. ) so anyways, i finish up the tests, which was super long. and boring, and a lot of other classes got let out and i figured she'd be gone by the time i got out there, so i just go out of my class kinda sad that i missed another chance...and it was my fault. but wait! she walks RIGHT in front of me, and i'm like, Wow, God, ur really good at this stuff. so i run up and ask her if she knows who i am...and then we kinda talked for a little bit, or whatevers before she left. but finally meeting someone you've been waiting to meet for like all of hs...is quite something. I think it's also cuz i hyped it up so much, but i was like. wow. i finally met her. Praise God.